The silence of early AM car rides home. The long walk to find the ATM. The emptiness in your soul when the last dollar is gone.
Gambling was a lonely existence.
From Casual to Compulsive
When I first got into poker, I would play with my college buddies. Everyone was doing it and we always played for small stakes.
I never wanted to lose, but there wasn’t the same embarrassment of losing when the stakes were so low.
As I moved to playing online and at local poker halls, the stakes began to grow and I began to only play alone.
Gambling Alone Feels Safer
The best part of gambling alone was the security that I could hide my losses. It was safer to go alone and avoid waving a red flag that things weren’t going well to my friends or family.
There was nothing more humiliating than being broke at the table, and this wasn’t something I wanted anyone I knew to see.