Hey everyone, and welcome to the After Gambling Podcast. My name is Jamie, and I am a compulsive gambler. The last time I gambled was July 15th of 2010.
Today, we’re going to dive into a topic that I think anyone in recovery has gone through at some point: trying to figure out how to fill the time we used to spend gambling. For us as gamblers, this is especially important because we often spent hours, if not days or weeks, gambling. Outside of work, it was probably the number one thing we spent our time on, in addition to our money. So when we stop, there’s a huge void of time that we have to fill.
These are the times when we can get into the most trouble—if we’re left to our own devices, just sitting in isolation. Not having a plan for what to do next often leads us to relapse. And when we’re isolated with our own thoughts, that’s when the urges really start to pop up. I think if you look back, the times when you were busy, at work or out with friends, you weren’t as focused on gambling. You may have thought about it here or there, but being engaged kept your mind off of it.
The trick is to find new things that can hold your attention and fill up that time. When we’re involved with activities—like spending quality time with friends—we’re not thinking about gambling as much. Sure, we might think about it a little because we’re still in recovery, but the more we stay engaged in something else, the less we think about gambling. Slowly, those thoughts begin to fade.
So, what are some things we can do to fill that time? What are some new hobbies to pick up? This is a common question on Reddit and Discord: What did you do to fill your time after quitting gambling?
The first question I’ll ask is, what did you do before you started gambling? Think about it. You didn’t grow up gambling, right? Even if you started as early as your teenage years, you still did things before gambling took over. For me, before I got into poker, I played golf. I played sports, spent time hanging out with friends, worked, and went to school. What did you do before gambling? Were you into writing? Reading? Did you enjoy learning new things?
If it’s healthy and still possible to do those things, that’s a great place to start. You can get back into sports or learning something new. Learning doesn’t stop just because you finish school. There are countless online resources—like learning to cook or becoming a YouTube creator. There are so many ways to engage with the world. Whether it’s knitting, board games, or something completely different, think about what you used to enjoy. Reach out to those who were part of those activities—see if they’re still doing them and if you can join in again.
Next, let’s talk about something else you can focus on—your career. When we gamble, we lose a lot of money. A great way to earn some of that back is by advancing in your career. What certifications or skills could you acquire to help you move up at work? Are there additional shifts or tasks you can take on? What conferences could you attend? These are all ways to show your value and make a case for a raise or promotion.
If you’re not happy in your current job, maybe you should start looking for a new one. Update your resume, dust it off, and start making moves. Just don’t quit until you’ve found another job—remember, the best time to look for a new job is when you already have one.
Third, let’s talk about exercise. Exercise is one of the best ways to relieve stress, combat depression, and feel healthier overall. I go in and out of phases with working out, but it’s something that I always come back to because I know how good it is for me. After I finish recording this podcast, I’m actually planning to hit the elliptical. You can hold me accountable—I’ll post a picture somewhere! Exercise doesn’t have to mean hitting the gym—long walks, yoga, or even gardening are great ways to stay active. It doesn’t matter what you do, just as long as you get moving.
And then there’s family and friends. When we were gambling, they often got the short end of the stick. Even when we were around them, our minds were on gambling. Now’s the time to rebuild those relationships. It might be awkward at first—some people may be hurt by how we treated them in the past—but start small. Reach out, ask if they’d like to meet for coffee or do something you used to do together. It may take time, but reconnecting with those we love is a huge step toward healing.
For me, getting involved with new groups helped a lot. My kids started school, and there’s a parent-teacher association. Normally, I wouldn’t have thought to volunteer, but it’s a way to push myself outside of my comfort zone. The more we put ourselves out there, the more we connect with others. GA (Gamblers Anonymous) meetings have also been a big help. I didn’t love them at first, but now I really enjoy going, especially when we’re laughing and supporting each other.
So, let’s recap. First, think about hobbies—both old and new. Next, focus on your career—improving skills, seeking new opportunities. Third, get active—whether it’s working out or taking up a physical hobby. Lastly, reconnect with family and friends, and look for new connections. It’s all about breaking that cycle of isolation.
If you have ideas about what’s helped you fill your time, I’d love to hear them. You can find me on social media or send me an email at jamie@aftergambling.com. Hearing from listeners—whether you’re on day one or day 1000—always lifts my spirits.
Remember, I’m not a doctor or therapist. Everything discussed here is just for informational purposes. If you’re struggling, please seek professional help.
Finally, the music for the show is “Something Elated” by Broke for Free, licensed under Creative Commons. Thanks so much for tuning in. I’ll see you in the next episode!
